Handling the Holidays
Post written by Ryan Ferrier. Follow me on Twitter.
The holidays are in full swing and at this point I am getting owned. Life is busier than ever, my travel plans have changed twice, and I’ve been sick.
I’m writing this post in the hopes that I will follow my own advice. Here are a few things that I am going to do starting today to make it through the holidays sane. Who knows? I may even have a little fun along the way.
Take 5
Begin each day with five minutes to yourself. Get alone, be quiet and just breathe. As much as possible focus solely on your breath. As thoughts of the countless things that need to be done race through your mind, let them pass. For this five minutes, it’s not your job to make plans or find solutions. It’s your job to breathe.
This may sound hokey. But believe me, Grasshopper, it works.
It’s a powerful five minutes in that you are feeding yourself the following messages:
- I am going to approach my day with a clear head.
- No matter how busy life is, I need to take care of myself if I am going to be helpful to others.
- My life is not lived in response to external demands. I choose how I want to spend my day.
- I have literally just done *nothing* for the past five minutes and the world is still turning.
Start your day with this practice. If at some point during the day it seems that things are spinning out of control, repeat.
Make a list
Santa’s making a list and checking it twice, you should do the same.
List out all the things that you need to do to get through the holidays. Put anything you can think of on the list. Be exhaustive.
Once you’ve made your list, go through and identify anything that you can put off until after the holidays or delegate to someone else. Cross these items off the list. Congrats, you’ve just accomplished something!
Move those crossed off items to two new lists: an “After the Holidays” list and a “To Delegate” list. Put the first list away for later. Keep the “To Delegate” list handy.
Pick your Must Do Items for the day
Now go through your list and pick the two or three Must Do items for today (start with delegating the tasks from your “To Delegate” list). These are the only tasks that you need to worry about for today. Tomorrow you can pick a set of new Must Do items. Repeat until your list is complete.
New things will inevitably come up. You can add them to your list as they come up but not until you have asked yourself: Can this wait until after the holidays? and Can I delegate this task? If the answer is yes to either of those questions, go ahead and add that item to your “After the Holidays” list or delegate it immediately.
Just say No!
Remember high school D.A.R.E class? Remember what you need to do when some shady teenager asks you if you want to do drugs?… You just say no.
You need to do the same with Holiday meet-ups. Just say no… to some of them- especially the ones that you don’t really want to go to. You can only fit so many Holiday parties and “I haven’t seen you in a while lunches” into the season. If you try and attend all of them, you will drive yourself mad and not really enjoy any of them.
This year I’ve pushed almost all of my meet-ups in December to the new year. Originally, I was concerned about letting others down. I’ve quickly found though that often the other party is also relieved to have one less meet-up on the calendar in ‘09.
Be in the moment
Each of the previous practices mentioned afford you the space and time to be in the moment- whether you are buying gifts, running errands, or meeting up with friends. That said, it helps to consciously choose to be present.
Actively decide to enjoy the task at hand or the person you are with. You’ve got a system to deal with rest, so let go and enjoy the moment.
Prioritize what matters
Don’t just be in the moment. Be in the right moment. The holidays are a unique time in that almost everyone has carved out time to spend it with people that they love. Prioritize your time so that you can spend quality time with people that matter to you.
Give yourself a break
Inevitably your plans will go awry, a meet-up will be missed, and you’ll forget that one thing that was not to be forgotten. And in the end, it will all work out.
The holidays are not about perfectly executing your plans. This season, your aim is to enjoy yourself and the people around you. To do that, you’ll need to give yourself a break.
If the rib roast burns and your dinner plan is ruined, no need to stress. See it as an opportunity to start a new holiday tradition. Throw on a santa hat, order some pizza, and sing deck the halls.
Don’t waste time getting frustrated at yourself and others when your holidays get a little messy. Life is messy. Families are really messy. Embrace the mess and enjoy the people around you.
What about you all? Any tips for staying sane over the holidays?
posted: 09 December 22
under: Life